Should My Aspiring Content Creator Friend Stop Exploiting People for Material?

One Side: Beth

Sometimes she films me while having a meal. I’ll see myself on her Instagram – it feels like a jumpscare.

A close companion of a decade, she, calls herself the “creativity monarch”. It’s fun for a short while, but it strains our friendship.

She is an extrovert, there's a constant urge the need to document everything all the time. During meals out, she says, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which induces embarrassment. I don’t like it when other people see her performing for the camera – I experience secondhand embarrassment. It also frustrates me because the food gets cold.

She's not quite an influencer yet, but she is trying to be. She makes video blogs about city life, her daily routine, and her styling career. The material is quality, credit where it's due, but I don’t want to be involved. Sometimes she films me while dining, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her feed later, and it pops up like a surprise: I’ll have bare-faced, an awkward face or be captured while eating. It feels invasive.

She also anticipates that I will to record her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I’ll be talking to someone else, or we're simply hanging out in the street. I feel like our friendship has transformed into me serving as her free crew. She could easily employ someone if she wanted professional shots. When I brought up my unease about the situation, she dismissed it. I've been invited to a couple of brand events, which were appreciated, but that doesn’t make up for all the energy I spend assisting her create material.

I’m grateful that Marielle has supported me with my design career, but I don’t want our connection to become merely a tally of exchanges. I don't believe she’s fake or dishonest, but sometimes I feel that if the camera is out, we will start performing in a way that makes us look good for her vlog.

Her directive is, “OK, look happy!” and film me smiling with someone. It’s so silly. I need her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has limits. I enjoy spending time with her, but I also want to experience it without being recorded, edited, or shared for an audience. I am not a prop for her Instagram.

The Other Side: The Content Creator's View

I hope my friend to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I love shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Producing content and sharing my life online enables me to show my personality and engage with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to make money from your passions. I admire people on social platforms who execute that style of casual, DIY content creation.

Content creation is my interpretation of engaging with life: noticing the details, posting them with an viewership that appreciates the art behind it. I never intend to make my friend uncomfortable. Bringing her to professional gatherings was my way of sharing opportunities, providing her a chance to witness exclusive moments that could benefit her professional path too. That isn't blackmail, it’s just being realistic.

I would take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I want her to see the benefits the content we make together can achieve: a foot in the door. I know not everyone likes being filmed, but sometimes unplanned moments is what makes content authentic. Appearing on video occasionally is an inherent aspect of being my friend. I would delete anything she requested, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don't demand anybody to be my private videographer, but friends help each other in small ways. I thought filming a short video now and then would be fun for her. Innovation flourishes in collaboration, and having my friend around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I never force her to take part in anything, and I would never intentionally humiliate her. But filming together sometimes is part of how I document our time together.

I cherish our friendship profoundly and want to avoid content creation to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to compromise: like requesting permission before filming, and steering clear of shots that might make her uncomfortable.

This isn’t about control, it's regarding expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Clearly content creation is not a replacement for genuine friendship: it's merely part of how I experience life and I want her to be involved in a way that’s agreeable for each of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Is it right for her to stop filming herself and her friend when they are out together?

Nothing is more uncomfortable than having a companion point a camera at you. I understand that it’s Marielle’s passion, but I don’t make friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find influencer friends to create content with. With the dark, looming future of AI, personal relationships are the only thing we have – cherish them!
Liberty, 25

If you’re doing something as a career, you can’t ask your friends for help every time, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys shooting, that doesn't imply everyone around her is content. She must to honor her friend's privacy.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love producing videos and showing off her life publicly, but it’s not for everyone. It was kind she has assisted her friend professionally, but she needs to listen to what Beth wants.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you value each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the focus in your friendship. Create some authentic experiences, where true emotions are stored, not digital scrapbooks. Even celebrities who seem to share their worlds actually have more secrecy than it appears.
One opinion, 53

Marielle appears to be neither present nor authentic when they're together – she's on the job. Each appears unsure as to where the line is. The answer is not found in trying to alter one another, but in each setting defined limits around what feels acceptable to them and seeing if there is an acceptable compromise.
A final view, 71

Your Turn to Be the Judge

In an online poll: is Marielle exploiting their friendship?